Feeling Unprepared After Doula Training? How Mentorship and Peer Support Can Bridge the Gap
When I first stepped into the world of doula work, I did what so many of us do—I invested thousands of dollars into training. I can still remember the excitement of signing up, the weight of that commitment, and the hope that by the end I would feel fully prepared to support families with confidence.
But the truth is, I didn’t.
Like many doulas, I left my training with plenty of knowledge but little idea of how to translate it into real-life practice. The organization I trained with didn’t know my name or my story, and there was no one checking in to see where I might need support. I walked away lacking the confidence I longed for when stepping into a birth or postpartum space.
That confidence came later—through mentorship, shadowing, and peer support. And honestly, that’s where the real learning began.
Over time, I’ve come to see just how distinct—and essential—each of these experiences really is:
Mentorship is relational. A mentor doesn’t just share information; they invest in you. They learn who you are, notice where you’re struggling, and hold space for both your fears and your growth.
Peer Support is community. It’s walking side by side with other doulas, sharing stories and struggles, and reminding one another that we are not alone in this work.
Shadowing is observation. It’s being welcomed into a real-life doula situation—not as a student being taught step by step, but as an observer learning by watching.
Each one shaped me in ways that training alone never could.
I often find myself wondering: why is it so easy for us to spend thousands of dollars on training programs that leave us unprepared, yet so difficult to invest in mentorship, shadowing, or peer support—things that provide exactly the kind of growth we’re missing?
Most training organizations are large and impersonal. You pay, you take the course, you finish. The relationship usually ends there.
But mentors are different. They know your name. They celebrate your wins and check in when you’re quiet. They see you, hold space for you, and genuinely want to see you thrive.
And yet, many new doulas expect this kind of care and attention for free.
I’ll be honest—this is the part that can feel uncomfortable, but it’s important to talk about. Mentorship and shadowing are not entitlements.
I’ve had doulas ask to shadow births without recognizing what it actually requires—client consent, trust, and me taking on extra responsibility in an already sacred space. Others have asked for ongoing mentorship without realizing the time, energy, and emotional labour it involves.
And yet, those same doulas were able to hand over thousands of dollars to a training organization that didn’t know anything about them.
So it leaves me asking: what makes one acceptable but not the other?
For me, mentorship and peer support have become central to the work I do. Not only because I wish I’d had more of it when I was starting out, but because I believe our profession can only grow stronger when we truly value one another.
That means:
Normalizing paying for mentorship just as we pay for training.
Acknowledging that peer support takes energy, and showing up with reciprocity.
Treating shadowing opportunities as a privilege, not a guarantee.
Because in the end, the certificate on the wall isn’t what makes you a doula. The growth, the confidence, the resilience—those come from the relationships built with mentors, peers, and those who walk beside us.
When I look back at my own journey, I’m grateful for my training—it opened the door. But mentorship, shadowing, and peer support? Those are what helped me step through it with confidence.
If you’re a newer doula, or a doula struggling in an aspect of doula work, I encourage you to reflect on where you’re investing your energy and resources. Are you valuing the people who are truly showing up for you as much as the organization that gave you your certificate?
And if you’re a seasoned doula, I hope we keep working toward a culture that values our time, energy, and wisdom just as much as formal training programs.
Because at the end of the day, our profession doesn’t grow stronger through textbooks alone—it grows through the way we learn from, support, and honour one another.
Amy Silva
Founder and CEO of The Collaborative Doula Collective